"Hmm. Let's see what I can show you. First of all, you'll probably notice that your dad likes my butt. You'll see lots of photos that show it. So, now you know. You've been warned son." She chuckled then pulled one and took a deep breath.
|Photo of my mom winning a match against a 32-year old housewife|
"Ha! There you go. You see? Dad liked my butt. It's bigger today, but he still likes it. This was taken maybe 17 years ago when I was slimmer. I must have been about 30 years old then. He took this pic of me being pinned by this tough 25-year old redhead. That was a mean matchbox pin. I lost that match. She was good and quite strong."
|Photo of my mom when she was about 30-years old being pinned by a younger redhead|
|Photo of my mom when she was about 40 years old pinning a girl half her age|
|Photo of my mom being scissored and choked by a talented high-society lawyer|
|Photo of my mom when she was about 42 tapping out against a tough blonde in her late 40s.|
|Photo of my mom in a strip wrestling match as she was trying to choke her opponent|
|Photo of my mom with a grapevine pin on a busty businesswoman|
"These two photos were taken about three years ago at a small organized event in New York. We wore one piece outfits and this blonde 43-year old housewife with four kids submitted me with some form of figure-four leg choke and then she pinned me with a grapevine. I was sure that I could beat her and she won 2 falls to none. I don't know what happened that day. I guess it was her day to win. It's just one of those things, you know. Sometimes you don't expect the unexpected. I was kind of disappointed at my performance that day."
|Photo of my mom about to submit to a 43-year old mom at a small wrestling tournament|
|Photo of my mom caught in a grapevine pin and losing the match 2 falls to 0|
|My mom had her in a cross body pin until she managed to wrap her legs around my mom's neck|
“Oh yeah, I remember this next one. Your dad calls it my leg shot. That was such an embarrassing loss. Remember when I said that we went to Miami? One of the reasons was to participate in an all-female submission wrestling tournament. I must have been in my early 30s. Anyway, I entered my name and bought this light green French-cut outfit in Miami. It cost me a fortune, and your dad really loved it. We also borrowed a good camera from uncle Reggie which is why the quality is better than some of those other photos you’ve looked at. So, anyway, we were, I think, about 20 to 30 women participating in a special tournament with prize money, and there were only two weight classes. Light and heavy. I was in the lightweight class and so were most of the other women. I think that heavyweight was like over 160 lb or so. And they didn’t use our names. Only a number. It was kind of random and anonymous. The numbers would move ahead on this elimination diagram board, or stay put depending if you won or lost. I think I had number 7. Yeah, lucky 7. It was bizarre. I think she had number 13. So, I had the lucky number and she had the unlucky one. I figured that this was a sign that I’d win this match rather handily. Well, so much for that thought! I remember stepping up on this blue mat in my sexy outfit so I’d be the center of attraction and I’d beat my opponent. I was all hyped up. Then here comes this smaller woman, but not by much, but she didn’t look intimidating at all to me. I’m not sure if she was Porto Rican or Cuban, but she had darker skin than my milky white tone and she could barely speak English. She wore these weird looking stretch pants and a halter top, which gave me the impression that she wasn’t dressed properly for this event and therefore wasn’t much of a wrestler. Her husband sat close to the mats and kept talking to her in Spanish, so I had no idea what they were talking about. I was thinking to myself, I’ll take you down a few notches, little missy, and next time, dress for the occasion. Well, when the referee gave us the sign to wrestle, we grappled a bit to test each other out, which was fine and, well, so far so good anyway. Then out of nowhere, she reached around my neck and caught me in this friggin’ headlock, took me down hard, like a pro, and kept me in that position for what felt like an hour. Your dad said I was there for about 3 to 4 minutes. She really had me there. That’s when dad took this photo. I literally couldn’t fight her off. She must have had some jiu jitsu or judo training because I found out really fast that she knew how to fight. Notice her right foot. A few seconds later, she just straightened her leg and pushed hard on the mat with that foot, which rolled me on my back. But it also tightened the choke hold so much that I just couldn’t breathe. I heard her husband saying stuff in Spanish and she was talking back to him as if I wasn’t there. Talk about humiliation… I must have been turning blue, I tried to bridge, but my neck was being constricted so tightly that I was starting to pass out. So I had to tap out. This was, like, 5 minutes into my first match and I was already eliminated by a smaller woman wearing a cheap outfit who didn’t speak English. After I had tapped out, she sort of smiled at me for, like, 2 seconds then got up and went back to talking to her husband as if nothing had happened. I just sat there, stunned, in my new sexy outfit, feeling like shit. She made it look so easy to win against me. I felt like I was nothing. I wanted to find a corner and hide, and even cry. I try to forget that day, but your dad sure loves the picture because of my leg shot.”
|Photo of my mom caught in a headlock shortly before submitting to this surprisingly good wrestler|
"I need to find you a photo of me winning at a tournament now. You'll think that I lost more matches than I won. Ha! Here's one. The same year of the tournament in which I wore my sexy green outfit. This one was held in Toronto I think. I'm straddling this French Canadian housewife with a school girl pin in this photo. I got to count to ten. They're so friendly up there, but she was really pissed. She wanted a rematch because she claimed that I counted too fast. But I know that I could have stayed on top of her for another ten seconds. I knew that I was stronger than her but she was very competitive and upset that she lost. I remember her challenging me in French to fight her again as I walked away. In hindsight, maybe I should have taken her on again and beat her twice, just to prove that I was the better woman. Oh well, too late now."
|Photo of my mom winning with this school girl pin against a French Canadian housewife|
"Remember when I told you that I won twice against Gail. This pic was taken a couple of months ago. I'm pinning Gail in this photo. Right here in our living room. You were staying at Mark's house that night. After this pin, Gail and I were even at 2 wins each, until tonight. But I'll get her next time."
|Photo of my mom at 47-years of age with a grapevine pin on Gail in our living room|
"OK, well you've seen enough photos for now. Maybe some other day, I'll show you more. I'll try to find some of the photos of me going at it naked against the police officer. But I'll be picky in what I can show you. I'm going to bed now. Goodnight, son."
She put the photos away, got up and went upstairs to bed while I was left hanging, wanting more. When I came back to earth and I got a dose of reality, it felt kind of perverse that I had these mental images of my mom fighting all these different women. How could I deal with this mind blowing revelation about my own mother? Ah, to hell with reality. I had my mind set on asking her to see more photos. Did she agree? Maybe I'll let you know later...